Which parenting style is most encouraged in modern America?

An authoritative parenting style is highly recommended as it effectively fosters healthy child development while establishing clear boundaries and reasonable expectations, supported by thoughtful explanations.

Parenting style is something that portrays different types of personality traits. Simply, we can define parenting style in terms of characteristics observed in each style of parenting with their child. As parents, it’s our responsibility to raise children in a balanced way that includes empathy, discipline, and compassion. And it’s essential to set boundaries because they don’t know what to expect or which behaviour is acceptable and which isn’t. Let’s go into detail about different parenting styles. Parenting style varies across families with diverse cultural backgrounds and spiritual and ethnic life.

• Authoritarian style
• Permissive style
• Uninvolved style
• Authoritative style

Each category follows a different approach to raising children and shaping their morals with values, principles, language, and behaviours.

4 Main Parenting Categories

Authoritarian style

Parents prioritize obedience and impose strict rules and expectations. That is, they expect their orders to be obeyed without question. Because of this, children may struggle with decision-making and independence, score worse on self-esteem and happiness, and face difficulty in social connections.

Permissive style

They are lenient, with few demands and minimal discipline. They act as friends instead of responsible parents and prioritize children’s freedom and happiness. This will impact self-regulation, boundaries, and responsibilities. Also, they struggle to set limits because of less enforcement from parents and face behavioral issues. This lack of control from parents will lead to health problems like unregulated food intake, lack of sleeping habits, etc.

Uninvolved style

Parents’ involvement is very low in responsiveness, demands, and communication. That is, children may not receive any emotional support, guidance, rules, or attention.

Authoritarian style

This parenting style is widely encouraged because it’s effective in promoting healthy child development and sets clear boundaries and reasonable expectations with reasons behind their actions. And also fosters frequent communication with their opinions, respects their values and feelings, and involves them in the decision-making process. This style helps not only parent-child relationships but also helps to develop high self-esteem and social skills. If you want a positive outcome, then it requires a lot of patience and effort from both sides.

They use supportive tools instead of punishments for their errors. This style not only focuses on social connection and emotional well-being but also encourages independence. So that children manage and achieve their goals in school on their own, handle negative emotions effectively, and excel in academics. Hence, this authoritarian style is encouraged in America.

• They support their children when they make mistakes.
• They give age-appropriate responsibilities.
• They watch them when they fail and give them time to solve their problems.

Benefits of Authoritative Style

• Parents set boundaries so that the children know what to do and what not to do.
  • Children develop high self-esteem, and they will be able to fix their problems. Because children know that parents are there to help them.
• They will have good behavior towards parents and others and also analyze and choose what’s right for them.
• Children are not only good at discipline but also good at problem-solving. They help their children to understand to “learn from mistakes” instead of repeating the same again.
• This style allows independence from an early age.

Principle attributes of the Authoritative style

Setting limits together

Authoritative parents set clear boundaries and explain the rules—why they are set and why they should not be broken. On the other hand, parents listen to their children’s opinions, but they remain the ultimate decision-makers. Parents should frequently express their love and affection, which will encourage positive parenting.

Example: Bedtime at 8:00 pm, else you will lose your phone on weekends. When it comes to setting limits, it’s important to discuss them with your partner. Because everyone will have a different perspective on growing up as a child. And it’s more important to maintain the same limit when living in the same house. Consistency is the main key to setting clear rules, and the parents who follow an authoritative approach stick to the rules.

As a mom, I can understand that every parent who has a child will struggle to make them listen to what we say or to make them cooperate or deal with tantrums. If things are not your way, you feel frustrated. But we can’t expect the results sooner. It takes time, consistency, and patience for a long-term outcome. The parenting perspective has changed a lot over the years, and research also suggests that the authoritative style gives the best for children as it develops better emotional regulation, self-confidence, independence, and secure attachment where they feel secure and safe to explore the new things in the world.

Encourage Discipline from an early age

Cultivating discipline from an early age tells your child that all living beings have boundaries in the world, and it’s necessary to respect them. It teaches your child to control themselves instead of reacting immediately. This self-discipline also teaches your child to be accountable for what they do. Consider and teach age-appropriate discipline like kindness, responsibility, obedience, integrity, etc.

This should be in the form of love or fun between you and your child. Authoritative parents give a positive response when the children misbehave. Instead of punishing them, they help and support them. Instead of criticism, they show empathy. Just give them reassurance that you are there for them. Authoritative parents don’t involve in revenge or bride kind of activities with them.

Warmth and nurture

Authoritative parents take care of their children from a young age and show interest in their child’s interests. This unconditional love from their parents will help them to grow up to be good people. Also, this style encourages people to take care of others and themselves as well.

Busy parents often don’t find time to spend with their children. Always remember, parents are children’s first teachers. The warmth and nurturing from parents will greatly influence them when they become adults. Children who are brought up under parental warmth are likely to be confident, feel loved, and learn how to be independent. The best part is that parents use a sense of humor to diffuse serious situations like stress, etc. They make the children feel special by celebrating their little accomplishments.

Promotes Independence

Being truly independent means children learn to live independently and not to rely totally on parents. This boosts their self-esteem as they take responsibility for their actions. This builds curiosity in trying new things beyond their imagined level and also promotes creativity.

Authoritative parents give responsibility to their children, like choosing their own clothes, deciding what to eat, etc. Trust their choices, and they will learn through exploration. Because they believe that overprotection towards children can have a negative effect by limiting their freedom. Authoritative exams create a safe space for your children to explore within certain boundaries. Overprotection undercuts your trust with your children, and this also limits your child’s ability to learn from experience. Overprotective environments don’t allow your child to make responsible decisions.

Fosters Open Communication

Communication is the essential key for the parenting journey. “When you listen to them, your child learns to listen to you.”. Open communication begins when parents listen to their child without interrupting or shutting down the conversation. Parents take an active role in listening to their words or actions without judgment. Authoritative parents give positive attention and praise for good behavior. This act will show that they are interested in their opinions and feel valued. This effective communication establishes trust and understanding between them rather than yes-or-no commands. So that they take responsibility for how to communicate with others.

Provides emotional support

As they grow, they need emotional support from their parents. This authoritative parenting manages their emotions. That is, they don’t overreact to the child’s behaviour and also provide emotional support. In this busy life, we shift our thoughts and lose control over our children. Without rushing, authoritative parents take a deep breath to step aside for a while. They use a light tone of voice to help them understand their behaviour without judgements or arguments. Stay calm even if they don’t listen to you. Remind yourself to stay cool, even if they become more stubborn.

Takeaways

As parents, our ultimate goal is to raise healthy, happy, independent, and responsible children. Children also observe their parents’ behaviours, like how they act in different situations. That is, they observe and learn from what they see rather than what they hear.

Which parenting style do you find as best?. You may have used to be authoritarian or have grown to be permissive, but choosing the right parenting style is important for your kids, and never feel tired to do better in this parenting journey.